Since I flatly refuse to have any resemblace of the said Duff on my blog I put some flowers here instead. Aren't they pretty?

My First (And last) Duff Review

Okay. I did it.

I sat through one of those hidious 'Duff' movies and uttered nary a word. It nearly killed me.
But now I am free to critique to my hearts content. And don't tell me I am overthinking this. A pencil may be carbon but that doesn't make it a diamond.

Where do I even begin. Lets start with the title.
A Cinderella Story....Yes, no one will guess how this one ends.


Picture this. The clock is about to strike midnight and Cinderella must leave Prince Charming before her magic disguise disappears. She runs away from the castle, but in her haste she drops... a mobile phone? Just one of the ill-conceived embellishments in "A Cinderella Story", a ham-fisted and futile update of the already unfemanist fairytale set in contemporary California. The result is pure pumpkin, though fans of squeaky-clean, helium-voiced Hilary Duff might fall under its sickly sweet spell.

Orphaned at an early age, teenager Sam Montgomery is forced to live with her wicked, Botox-fixated stepmom and her mean-spirited stepsisters. When not tending to their every whim, she works at her late father's restaurant, a job that earns her the unflattering nickname "Diner Girl" at her bitchy all-American high school.

Beyond the obvious use of Cinderella, A Cinderella Story is a blueprint movie that strives to hit all of the expected notes, but it's a safe movie for the 8 year olds to see (even though they might even be slightly insulted). We have the nerdy, destined-only-to-be-platonic boy pal, Carter; the sassy mother/sister role model, Rhonda; the evil and imbecilic nemesis, Fiona; boy band-like cutie/romantic interest Austin; the sci-fi freakazoid; and Bobby the Cook. No safe, inoffensive, socially acceptable stereotype is left behind. Right down to the cheerleaders squad who didn't have a frumpy, non-clique face in the herd. (No offence to cheerleading Starla. Just the media portrayal bugs me)

The first problem with any update of the “Cinderella” story is that we already know how the thing ends. You don’t need a spoiler warning to tell everyone that the girl gets the guy and they all live happily ever after, or at least until Prince Charming decides he doesn’t want to be “tied down” and runs off with Snow White to Reno. At this point, things like freshness of approach and quality of performance become important not to mention creativity and originality: does the actress playing Cinderella win the audience over? How evil are the stepmother and stepsisters without being walking talking cliches?

In the end it is, at best, a dull rehash of the old girl-meets-boy anecdote. At worst, it is a good excuse to save 5$.

The writer, Leigh Dunlap doesn't strain herself to script meaningful dialogue, shock us with surprises or make anything in this movie memorable. However, she does provide some implausible situations that only happen because they help move the limping plot along, even when it's not realistic (not even "movie realistic"), like Austin being unable to recognize Sam because she's wearing a mask that covers only her eyes (I guess he's not too observant), or Hilary Duff playing the outcaste, ugly duckling even though she would be the head cheerleader and coolest girl on campus at any high school on the planet. And please don't get me started on the ending. You'll notice some blatantly obvious symbolism like Austin being the son of the "Car Wash King," hence, he must be a Prince (Charming, get it?!), or the painful modern twists such as Sam losing her cell phone instead of a glass slipper. None of it is very original or witty, and leads up to the worst conceived ending of the year (there I go talking about that ending again).

While A Cinderella Story refreshingly is free from the harmful messages and behaviors that have wrecked other movies aimed at younger people, I still found one theme that bothered me. In this syrupy-feel-good movie the writers strain to tell us people deserve a chance to overcome stereotypes and show us who they are on the inside. However, the movie very subtly tells the audience only pretty people get that chance. While Sam (a hottie) gets to show she is more than a working class girl, and Austin (a hottie) gets to show us he's a reluctant big man on campus who's intelligent and deep underneath the jock image, others are not so lucky. Our poor sci-fi freakazoid isn't allowed to show us his inner-self, even when he might be Sam's secret admirer, who has written the touching, wonderful love notes that captured her heart, and Carter is not allowed to get the girl until he puts on a mask to cover his "hideous" face. It has to be a two way street to convince me the sentiment is genuine.

Think about the outcast kids you knew in high school. There were always those lucky few individuals who, for some reason or another, found themselves verbally or psychologically abused by people from just about every stratum of high school popularity. Maybe they came to school wearing Nike knockoffs, maybe they were morbidly obese, or maybe they made the mistake of trying to come out of the closet before grad school. The point is, none of these people looked like Hilary Duff. Screenwriters need to quit constantly lying to kids about how they can be or do anything they want as long as they believe in themselves. That may be true for amply endowed blonde high-schoolers like Ms. Duff who – even though they live with their wicked stepmother – still drive a ’66 Mustang and can afford the latest cell phone and an Apple laptop. The rest of the lower middle class schlubs catching rides from your friend’s older brother, fighting acne, and wearing two-year old shoes can just forget it.

And another thing that really bugged me, Samantha’s supposedly perfect boy doesn’t pay any attention to her either. Not until she shows up at the dance in a low-cut dress, that is. “A Cinderella Story’s” message isn’t so much, “Be yourself and true love will find you,” but rather, “Pretty yourself up and show your cleavage and guys will find you.” Sage advice? Not the greatest example for our budding next generation of youth. What is this movie really telling them?

Another one of the key problems with "A Cinderella Story" is the fact that, as I mentioned before, for reasons that are unfathomable, Sam has not been given a drab look for the early scenes. Even when she is slaving away behind the counter of the diner, she is still looking salon-perfect everytime we see her. In fact, aside from a slightly more stylish hairdo, there is absolutely no difference in her appearance as she goes from plain to pretty. Therefore, the shocking transformation-the reason for this thing to exist in the first place-has been removed. There is a part of me that wanted to believe that this was intentional-that the filmmakers were trying to subvert the genre by illustrating the enormous gulf between movie-plain and plain-plain. However, I doubt that because the characters all seem to believe that a stunning transformation has taken place; the only possible explanation is that Duff, mindful of her teen-queen status, flat-out refused to look frumpy and the filmmakers decided to just press on and pretend as if she did.

Anyway, the bottom line, "A Cinderella Story" is a frustrating and convoluted modern fairy tale in which characters behave irrationally and without motivation. The movie knows it wants certain things to happen, but it has no idea how to construct a story that will lead to those events naturally. Instead, things just HAPPEN, without regard for whether those characters would actually do that, or whether real people would actually say that, or whatever. The film exists in its own little fantasy world where cause and effect have no place, and where you can talk to a woman face-to-face for an entire evening, but if a 2"x5" part of her face is covered with a mask, you won't recognize her when you talk to her again the next day.


Mel. L. E.


P.S.
Okay There was one thing I liked about the movie

Take a gander at this soundtrack.

1. 
   "This Will Be (An Everlasting Love)"Written by Charles Jackson and Marvin Jerome YancyPerformed by Natalie ColeCourtesy of Capitol RecordsUnder License from EMI Film & Television Music
   
2. "Sympathy"Written by John RzeznikPerformed by Goo Goo DollsCourtesy of Warner Bros. Records Inc.By Arrangement with Warner Strategic Marketing
   
3. "Rescue Me"Written by Raynard Miner and Carl SmithPerformed by Fontella BassCourtesy of Spirit Music GroupUnder License Dominion Entertainment, Inc.
   
4. "Going Out With A Bang"Written by G-Sleep and JeevePerformed by G-SleepCourtesy of Where's My Cut ProductionsBy Arrangement with PEN Music Group, Inc.
   
5. "First Day Of The Rest Of Our Lives"Written by Michael HerreraPerformed by MxPxCourtesy of A&M RecordsUnder License from Universal Music Enterprises
   
6. "Never Gonna Stop"Written by Sarah Nagourney, Jim Dyke, Richard Evenlind and Dennis LomdahlPerformed by Johanna HalversonCourtesy of Eclectic Productions AB
   
7. "Tear The Roof Off"Written by Raymond Freeman, Omar Womack, Kenyatta Sparks and Rodney RichardPerformed by Lo featuring Misery III
   
8. "Friend"Written by Kaitlyn Harner and Johnny DouglasPerformed by Kaitlyn
   
9. "I Need Your Loving"Written by Don Gardner, Clarence Lewis, James McDougal and Bobby RobinsonPerformed by Don Gardner and Dee Dee FordCourtesy of Arista Records, Inc.Under License from BMG Film and Television Music
   
10. "Coming Right Back"Written by B. Goode and William JamesPerformed by Soul PatrolCourtesy of Lee Silver Productions/Tru-Gems RecordsBy Arrangement with PEN Music Group
    
11. "Falling For You"Written by James Bourne, Charlie Simpson and Tom FletcherPerformed by BustedCourtesy of Island Records Ltd.Under License from Universal Music Enterprises
    
12. "Stolen Kisses"Written by Gabriel "Front Row" Rowland, Holland Greco, Derock Goodwin and Alex PainterPerformed by The Peak ShowCourtesy of Atlantic Recording Corp.By Arrangement with Warner Strategic Marketing
    
13. "The Best Day Of My Life"Written by David Katz, Robert Palmer, and Lindy RobbinsPerformed by Robert D. Palmer (featuring Michael Duff)
    
14. "Hit The Decks"Written by Aaron Carter and Stephen James BarryPerformed by CirrusCourtesy of Moonshine Music
    
15. "Fallen"Radio MixWritten by Richard Shelton, Kevin Veney, Loren Hill, Luiz Bonfa, Lanard Huggins and Maria ToledoPerformed by MyaCourtesy of Interscope RecordsUnder License from Universal Music Enterprises
    
16. "Where Ur At"Written by Simon Foretti, Jason Foretti and Nfa Forster-JonesPerformed by 1200 TechniquesCourtesy of Rubber Records
    
17. "I'll Be"Written by Edwin C. McCainPerformed by Edwin McCainCourtesy of Atlantic Recording Corp.By Arrangement with Warner Strategic Marketing
    
18. "Straight Laid Out"Written by Aaron Carter and Stephen James BarryPerformed by CirrusCourtesy of Moonshine Music
    
19. "Storm Warning"Written by Carl FisherPerformed by The VolcanosCourtesy of Jamie/Guyden Dist. Co.
    
20. "I Met A Girl"Written by Richard Brennan, Brendan Harney and Scott LevesquePerformed by WheatCourtesy of Aware Records/Columbia RecordsBy Arrangement with Sony Music Licensing
    
21. "Spanish Flea"Written by Julius WechterPerformed by Herb Alpert and the Tijuana BrassCourtesy of Almo Properties, LLC
    
22. "To Make You Feel My Love"Written by Bob DylanPerformed by Josh KellyCourtesy of Hollywood Records
    
23. "Now You Know"Written by Kara DioGuardi, Michelle Lewis and Charlton PettusPerformed by Kara DioGuardi
    
24. "Boom"Written by Allison Lurie and Paul RobbPerformed by Fan_3Courtesy of Geffen RecordsUnder License from Universal Music Enterprises
    
25. "Hear You Me"Written by James Adkins, Thomas D. Linton, Richard Byrch and Zachary LindPerformed by Jimmy Eat WorldCourtesy of DreamWorks RecordsUnder License from Universal Music Enterprises
    
    But then again, in a movie, it's usually the music that gets to me. I'm a sucker for a good tune.

Peace out and all that

*Mel*

One hundred and Ten days and counting.....

Just a short note. This is so awesome I can barely believe it. In approxamately 3 months I will be leaving Saskatoon to join Katimavick. The program lasts for about nine months. The planned departure date is September 23 but of course that is a long way off and subject to change. This is so exciting! I get to travel across Canada!

A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.
But then again, so does falling down a flight of stairs

Author Unknown